Fucktoy Tuesday? WTF! ;)

ok ok, I got myself into this allllll by myself again, haha, I'm not complaining :D!

still owing him a blow job I couldn't resist but started to stroke his cock, hoping he'll just grab my head and push it under the duvet and guess what, he did! God, it's hot under the duvet, totally added to the feeling used feeling. I got to suck his gorgeous cock for a little while but was then thrown over and held down to be fucked hard from behind, his hands pushing me down into the pillow with all his weight, holding me there in place, fucking me. I like the violent approach and the you're just a fucktoy treatment, thinking of being used and abused really turns me on. Rather harsh instructions follow, ass out, face down! I open my legs even wider and move towards his hard thrusts, wanting to feel him even deeper. His deep thrusts pushing me into the pillows, I love being fucked like that.

He then let go of me and turns me around on my back, everything happens really fast, as he sits on my chest and pushes his hard cock deep down my throat I think he'll probably face fuck me, which is really hot, but he just pushes his cock deep in and holds it there, cutting of air, making me struggle and gag violently, he allows me a few breaths and pushes his cock back in, repeating the same thing a couple more times, I look up at him, my eyes pleading him to let go of me, but he seems not to care, reducing me to a sobbing, pathetic mess he let's finally go and I try to catch my breath.

Not giving me long to recover he's back to fuck me again, legs wide spread, my muscles ache, his hands first over my mouth and nose then move on to strangulation, oh god I'm scared of this, it's hot, frighteningly hot! Feeling his strong hands holding tight around my neck, his cock entering my cunt with hard deep thrusts, he's fucking me whilst slowly cutting off the air flow, my head feels hot, I feel my heartbeat in my ears, I start to struggle, the grip of his hands is tight and painful, I struggle harder, trying to get away, terrified of passing out, of this unknown feeling of losing all control, he finally let go of my throat. I take a few deep breaths but his hands are already back around it and squeeze.
I lose count of how often he repeats this, but as I thought it couldn't get any scarier he pushes the pillow into my face, this is terrifying. there is no eye contact possible, something which kinda makes me feel still safe sometimes. First I can still breathe, restricted, it's not easy but still works, but he then pulls left and right of the pillow down to the mattress level, the fabric feels really hard all stretched and pulled down, my face totally enclosed by it, I am getting really off in this now, I can tell as I'm getting really really wet. I keep struggling though, trying to lift the pillow up on a site to get some air and it works, sort of, till I get caught out. He then tells me to put my hands on his ass and pull him in and have him fuck me real deep. I feel used, he's still suffocating me, I start to think all sort of things, will he make me pass out? does he care? is he getting off on this? I'm scared, I need to breathe, I need some air, now! I'm begging now, desperate and he finally let go of the pillow and let me take a few deep breaths. Now lying next to me he pushes my head towards his cock and demands me to make him come. My efforts are pathetic, I'm shaking, I can't breathe properly because of being a sobbing mess earlier, I actually want to cry. My at this stage best efforts are lousy and not at all satisfying, I can tell, getting told off for taking a break to catch my breath I wish I would have more energy to do a better job. He then confirms what I already knew, this is not good enough, too slow, I feel rubbish.

He tells me to go on my knees, hold on to the bed frame with both hands and to not let go of it, to open my legs wide and push my ass out. I'm all shaky, actually I feel broken. I'm simply obeying now, I have no energy any more not to. His cock enters my cunt again, and he fucks me, his thumb entering my ass I think I will just have to take this now, what ever will happen, he withdraws his cock and spits on my ass hole, degrading but oh so hot, oh so scary, the thought of his big cock up my tight ass, half an hour ago I may still had the energy to argue or pull away, now though I just hoped he's not going to tear me apart. I'm shaking, my muscles, my throat, everything is aching. I feel his hands remove mine from the frame, first one then the other and moving my legs together making me lie down flat on my tummy, his body resting now on mine, I'm breathing heavily, trying to recover, to calm down, shaking uncontrollably. A few minutes in and I start to relax. That's what happens when you play with my cock, he says. Silly girl, I reply. You're already not sorry any more you did though, he is right, I'm not, it was fucking hot! Maybe I even want to pass out next time I get used and played with.

I am addicted to fear?

Mxx